Tuesday, January 18, 2011

crow, help, frisby


Posted by Picasa The crow who usually holds court in The Grove is absent this morning. Instead I meet him on the curb in Grosevenor Road, waiting to cross.

Among the "lifestyle solutions" in a catalogue in the post to day is a pair spiked rubber devices to slip over your shoes which "help prevent broken bones, serious strains, pulled muscles and bruised pride."  There is also: a flexible workstation  for your laptop to cover your knees and keep your lap cool; an electronic cigarette , which looks and tastes like a real one and smoke which is "just water vapour".;  a grip to fit underneath rugs to stop them slipping; a device to extend a tight waist band by up to two inches; thermal socks  designed to prevent astronauts form the "cold of deep space"; your own private  portable urinal ... "for men and women";  a keyring which flashes and bleeps when you whistle; a spray to keep foxes away; and a puzzle roll made from clinging acrylic felt to allow jigsaws to be rolled up before completion without disturbing loose and fitted pieces.

A tall girl with blond hair and a blue jacket walks towards me in Calverley Ground. She is carrying a plastic lid or disk like a Frisbee.  It looks as though it has tooth marks on it, which give a hint of its purpose. She is accompanied by an athletic black dog of indeterminate breed. She throws the disk, which the dog bounds after and catches in mid air.

4 comments:

CC said...

Lovely Crow.

The Crow said...

What CC said.

Lucy said...

It's a wonderful world that hath such gadgets in it, though the steamy cigarette sounds fairly disgusting. So what did you order?

Plutarch said...

Tempted in varying degrees to all, I resisted ordering any.