Tuesday, November 18, 2008

window, teeth, conversation

Posted by Picasa Most of the pictures I have taken of the deserted cinema in the middle of Tunbridge Wells, have been at the back of the 1930's building. I take this one of an upper floor window from Mount Pleasant and find, as usual, that its features become more interesting, the more you look at them.

I see, in the driving seat of a passing car, a woman with a piece of paper in her mouth. She holds it between her teeth, with a purposeful expression the way dogs do.

Thinking about how to help conversations along, it occurs to me that conversationalists should, first of all, possess the gift of curiosity. This should lead them to prompt and assist those, who are are finding it difficult to express a complex idea, by trying to share their thought processes. The very opposite of trying to get the better of them. For what is difficult to express is sometimes the most worth while.


Lucy said...

I think much of a fairly simple knack of making conversation is simply about asking questions, preferably ones that one is genuinely interested in the answers too, so yes, curiosity.

I think at one time people were taught it was rather rude to ask questions, so are fearful of doing it. This may be one reason why women sometimes seem more easily able to hold conversations, because for some reason they are less inhibited in their curiosity, or perhaps they know that it flatters and pleases when people appear interested in you!

Too many people, though just hold forth, I'm probably guilty of this too. I suppose it's a kind of having the edge.

I'm not sure about technology killing conversation, it depends perhaps on the technology and how you use it. I find because I'm using words more here, actively as well as passively absorbing them, I'm often a little better able to reach for the right word or phrase in conversation. Also the encouragement I receive on-line has given me a little more confidence to express myself outside too.

Still be a little daunted to meet you though!

Roderick Robinson said...

Daunted, Lucy? Nah!

Rashmi said...

Wow! Does that mean Lucy and you haven't even met, let alone know each other?! And you've created 'Compasses' just online? I'm simply amazed if that's the case!

Unknown said...

It is the case, Rashmi. But it strikes me that this sort of blogging does help you to know someone, just as well if not better than encounters at social gatherings.

Rashmi said...

You're right, of course. But it still boggles my mind when I think of the depth of understanding, or shall we say the common thread of thought that effortlessly sews your poems with her pictures. It very easily and simply seems to be the work of people who've known each other for long and well.

I think we're all very fortunate to be living in this age.

Lucy said...

What a lovely comment Rashmi!

Bear in mind, though, that the photos were only my response to Joe's poems; someone else might have responded quite differently, but their images would then have been the ones that seemed to 'go' with them!

Joe only stipulated that I should read all the poems together before starting to publish them, so he sent them to me in batches, and we chatted a bit by e-mail at the same time. I think there have always been correspondences between people rather like this, but the beauty of the on-line world is they are so quick and immediate, while traditional letters, though perhaps more thought-out and reflective, always involved a delay.

But yes, we are fortunate indeed!