Sunday, February 14, 2010

Ceres, pink, golf ball



















The building beneath this cornice and statue of the corn goddess, Ceres, which borders the Pantiles no long trades in corn But on a sunny day, beneath a blue sky, it rewards an upward glance.

In the Farmers Market in Civic Way, there is a stall which sells only potatoes of unusual varieties. I enquire about some, with a dark red skin, labelled Highland Burgundy. Are they good for mashing? "Yes," says the potato grower, " they have a slightly pink colour when mashed. You could make your mash in pink heart shapes for Valentine's day. St Valentine's day, now almost behind us, this is the last time this year that I will report on the odd behaviour which it inspires.

In the middle of an expanse of grass in Calverley Ground, I spot a golf ball masquerading as a mushroom. There is not a golfer in sight, nor anyone practising with clubs. I pick it up, and run my hand over its indented surface. I am a little surprised by its lightness and touched by its whiteness. I toss it in the air. I wonder if I should rub it to see if it contains a genie; or kiss it to see if it turns into a princess. I throw it in the air and catch it. Then, despite its mysterious potential, the precise nature of which still eludes me, I grow impatient and toss it away, for someone more deserving and more in need of a golf ball, to find.
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5 comments:

Lucy said...

What a shame it's over, I've so enjoyed your anti-Valentine's posts! The image of slightly pink mashed potato shaped into a heart strikes me as quite hilarious and bizarre. If you had any left over you could perhaps mix it with some cooked red cabbage for a post-Valentine's bubble-and-squeak breakfast...

However, I feel I should register a mild protest at all this bah-humbuggery about the custom. A small and rosy festival could be quite a welcome thing in mid-February. I have been promised a curry at 'Le Ganges' in Rennes tomorrow, which in fact we were going to do anyway over the February holiday but which has been somewhat opportunistically appended to the day. As I remember you remarking before, no one but the British and the Indians really understand about curry, so the experience will not be quite gastronomically up to that of the Bloggers' Retreat, but there are enough francophone Indians, usually hailing from Pondicherry, to provide something reasonable in the more major towns, so I hope we will not be staring glumly across the table at each other!

Barrett Bonden said...

I only sent Mrs BB one Valentine's Day card, It said, "I've passed my driving test." Two days later I was made redundant from the magazine I was working on: MotorCycling. I've tended since to associate the occasion with what happened in the Chicago parking garage rather than the lovey-dovey stuff.

The golf ball could have provided you with a Works-Well-Yorick moment. The dimples have genuine aerodynamic significance and I believe their depth and other angular features are prescribed by the PGA. Several years ago the PGA prOscribed certain golf club faces because the horizontal slots thereon were thought to provide some sort of advantage. In both instances we're talking about tiny dimensional differences in what would otherwise be the simple event of a club striking a ball. You say you tossed the ball away which seems anti-cathartic. A golf ball, by virtue of its size and weight, almost demands to be thrown. But possibly you were governed by the thought of not giving Disgusted a real reason for writing to The Times.

Plutarch said...

L I hope you enjoy curry at Le Ganges, presumably a one syllable word. I'm all in favour of loving gestures really. The Ghost of Valentines Day Future has set me right.

BB I have a cricket ball in the drawer of my desk. I realize now, too late, that I should have kept the golf ball to keep it company. Thank you for supplying the word "dimples".

Lucy said...

Turns out it's 'Le Gange' without the 's' which is even odder. It was delightful, albeit in a very mild and creamy Mughal-French fusion kind of way. No mashed potato hearts, however.

Jucad Carbon Travel said...

The golf ball determines the basic reaction you get when you hit the ball. The higher the compression the less explosive reaction, the zoom compression on the ball on the tee. This is known as a soft ball or a low compression in the range between 70 and 80 units. This ball does not have the distance that you would like high compression 100. The lower compression balls are largely controlled, and are ideal for short shots and irons and wedges high.